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Editorial Reviews
A very Southern mother-in-law's humorous advice to mothers-in-law everywhere. From the multiple New York Times bestselling author of The Red Hat Club. Bestselling author Haywood Smith and her pals have lots of personal experience in the joys, sorrows, pitfalls and flat-out hysteria of Mother-in-Lawness. Now Smith offers a handy and fun booklet of pithy advice to mothers-in-law everywhere. Smiths sassy observations and gentle wisdom are delivered with her trademark southern charm, packing the sweet, heady punch of bourbon ice cubes melting in a mint julep. The Twelve Sacred Traditions of Magnificent Mothers-in-Law is the perfect gift book for showers, engagement parties, family celebrations or just to share with that special DIL (Daughter-in-Law) or SIL (Son-in-Law). It can even safely be given to a Mother-in-Law
Related Reviews
The Twelve Sacred Traditions of Magnificent Mothers-in-Law by Haywood Smith
Now here's a valuable book that imparts a message, yet does so in a VERY humorous manner without preaching! "The Twelve Sacred Traditions of Magnificent Mothers-in-Law" by Haywood Smith will have snickering, snorting, laughing, and (if you're married) suffering from a severe case of deja vu.
This is a perfect book to give as a gift...to just about any woman who has, will have, or has had a MIL (mother-in-law). I'm pretty sure that covers about 99% of women.
Haywood Smith provides twelve 'traditions' (read rules) for mothers-in-law (and mothers) everywhere with a full chapter of helpful advice, scenarios, and side-splitting commentary served up with a hefty dose of southern-style sweetness occasionally veering off into sarcasm.
A few of my favorite chapters were: Magnificent MILs ...Set and Respect Reasonable Boundaries, ...Bite Their Tongues, Never Wear Out Their Welcome, ...don't Martyr. I think the best thing about this book is that you could give one to your mother or mother-in-law 'as a joke'--and then pray they take Mrs. Smith's advice!!
This is a perfect book to give as a gift...to just about any woman who has, will have, or has had a MIL (mother-in-law). I'm pretty sure that covers about 99% of women.
Haywood Smith provides twelve 'traditions' (read rules) for mothers-in-law (and mothers) everywhere with a full chapter of helpful advice, scenarios, and side-splitting commentary served up with a hefty dose of southern-style sweetness occasionally veering off into sarcasm.
A few of my favorite chapters were: Magnificent MILs ...Set and Respect Reasonable Boundaries, ...Bite Their Tongues, Never Wear Out Their Welcome, ...don't Martyr. I think the best thing about this book is that you could give one to your mother or mother-in-law 'as a joke'--and then pray they take Mrs. Smith's advice!!
Humorous and Insightful. Very Helpful.
As a parent with adult children and a psychotherapist working with parents of adult children, I highyl recommend this book as a significant tool to repair or maintain your relationships. Humorous, easily read and right on!
Every mother-in-law should have this book.
I just love this book. Hayward Smith is so clever and funny, but she also nails it on all the suggestions for mothers-in-law or mothers for that matter. The book is short, but packed with good stuff. It's in my collection with all of her other books.
This book should be required reading for every prospective, new, or even experienced mother-in-law. The advice is really good. It's also presented in a warm and humorous way. Haywood Smith is an incredibly talented writer.
Incredibly powerful message - better than the marketing would indicate
I picked this book up for my Kindle back in March. Last night I decided I wanted something that I could pick up and read that was on the more light-hearted side and this looked appealing. I started reading thinking I would just read a chapter or two but ended up going all the way to the end in one sitting. It's short and sweet but there is some incredibly powerful stuff in here.
This book is billed as containing the twelve sacred traditions of being a wonderful mother-in-law. While that may be great for marketing and trying to sell to a niche, it actually shortchanges the book in my opinion. This book is wonderful for everyone who comes in contact with any other human being on a regular basis. The basic message is to mind your own business and don't offer opinions or meddle in other people's business. While delivered humorously and often light-heartedly, there is a lifetime of wisdom contained in these pages. The twelve traditions apply not only to mothers-in-law but also apply to any other family member (particularly mothers) and friends. It does a great job of talking about what you shouldn't do or say if you want to have good relationships with those you care about. One of my favorite parts dealt with disguising opinions as questions. She hits the nail on the head with that one and many people should take a long, hard look at their interactions with others to see if "interest" is really "bossiness".
While very short, very readable, and often humorous, this book is worth its weight in gold. If you want good relationships with other adults, take these to heart. If you want to have people resent you, be angry with you, and often try to spend as little time with you as possible, don't follow any of this advice.
You could go to a therapist and pay $125 an hour to find out why your relationships aren't working or you can buy this and do it yourself.
This book is billed as containing the twelve sacred traditions of being a wonderful mother-in-law. While that may be great for marketing and trying to sell to a niche, it actually shortchanges the book in my opinion. This book is wonderful for everyone who comes in contact with any other human being on a regular basis. The basic message is to mind your own business and don't offer opinions or meddle in other people's business. While delivered humorously and often light-heartedly, there is a lifetime of wisdom contained in these pages. The twelve traditions apply not only to mothers-in-law but also apply to any other family member (particularly mothers) and friends. It does a great job of talking about what you shouldn't do or say if you want to have good relationships with those you care about. One of my favorite parts dealt with disguising opinions as questions. She hits the nail on the head with that one and many people should take a long, hard look at their interactions with others to see if "interest" is really "bossiness".
While very short, very readable, and often humorous, this book is worth its weight in gold. If you want good relationships with other adults, take these to heart. If you want to have people resent you, be angry with you, and often try to spend as little time with you as possible, don't follow any of this advice.
You could go to a therapist and pay $125 an hour to find out why your relationships aren't working or you can buy this and do it yourself.
A great book every MIL or future MIL will enjoy!
The book begins with the following quote:
"Nobody gets any brownie points for loving people who are easy to love. Difficult people are God's sandpaper. They'll rub those rough edges off you and let you prove your faith."
A wonderful quote by the authors Granny Bess, who undoubtedly is a spring of lovely advice! She sprinkles helpful thoughts from her Granny through out the book. I loved them all, we all need a Granny Bess in our lives to keep us straight.
The tips and advice in the book are delivered in a funny "Been there or I know someone who has" format. Some of the things are light hearted and funny, such as "Let them learn from there mistakes, even if they use the money they saved by getting food stamps to go on a Caribbean cruise". Others are deeper, such as discussing spousal abuse.
I love this funny although short book and would encourage others to pick it up and give it a read. I'm sure, if you are like me, you will be laughing out loud at some of the stories she tells. In the end though, it has a good heartfelt moral of the story, so to speak. That is if you want to be close to your adult children and there spouses, you must learn to create boundaries so you are not unduly pushing yourself on them and to be careful not to step over them once they are in place. To always be kind and caring and to set a good example, even if you have to bite your tongue to do it. Great lessons for us all.
"Nobody gets any brownie points for loving people who are easy to love. Difficult people are God's sandpaper. They'll rub those rough edges off you and let you prove your faith."
A wonderful quote by the authors Granny Bess, who undoubtedly is a spring of lovely advice! She sprinkles helpful thoughts from her Granny through out the book. I loved them all, we all need a Granny Bess in our lives to keep us straight.
The tips and advice in the book are delivered in a funny "Been there or I know someone who has" format. Some of the things are light hearted and funny, such as "Let them learn from there mistakes, even if they use the money they saved by getting food stamps to go on a Caribbean cruise". Others are deeper, such as discussing spousal abuse.
I love this funny although short book and would encourage others to pick it up and give it a read. I'm sure, if you are like me, you will be laughing out loud at some of the stories she tells. In the end though, it has a good heartfelt moral of the story, so to speak. That is if you want to be close to your adult children and there spouses, you must learn to create boundaries so you are not unduly pushing yourself on them and to be careful not to step over them once they are in place. To always be kind and caring and to set a good example, even if you have to bite your tongue to do it. Great lessons for us all.
Great Gift for future mothers-in-law!
I purchased this book first for myself and was surprised that it was not only funny, but very insightful. As an "experienced" mother-in-law for four years, I've made many of the mistakes referenced in the book! I recently bought two copies of this book for a wedding shower gift for friends whose children were getting married. They were delighted and found the advice to be right on.
Yes, truly words you should try to live by. The book is staying permanently on the first page of my Kindle.
This book is not only funny, but contains a how-to on maintaining relationships. As a new MIL myself, I'll use it as a guide. Couldn't beat the price either.
This book is not only funny, but contains a how-to on maintaining relationships. As a new MIL myself, I'll use it as a guide. Couldn't beat the price either.
As a new mother-in-law myself X 2 in the past 8 months, I downloaded this freebie book on my Kindle, hoping for some great advice. For me, it was common sense advice, nothing really enlightening -- a good review of proper mother-in-law behavior, maybe. I won't be passing the title on to other new mothers-in-law that I know.
After the great reviews I was excited to read this book on my kindle. The beginning had some funny parts but after that I just wanted to get through it. Some of the stuff is common sense, some is going too far.
As a Magnificent MIL you are not supposed to smoke when you go to the DIL or SIL's house but if they're smokers and they come to your house, you're supposed to make sure and plan important things around their smoking schedule and you should set up a place outside for them to smoke if you don't want them smoking in the house. I'm not and have never been a smoker but my objection is that MIL's are supposed to bend over backwards to accomodate DILs or SILs but we should expect nothing in return?
The same goes for the chapter on Reading Minds. When the married children forgot one of the Magnificent MIL's birthday repeatedly she mailed them a postcard two weeks in advance to tell them to buy a funny birthday card for their mom. Then one week in advance she mailed them a note telling them to mail the card. Why? If they forgot my birthday I wouldn't want to have to do that much work to remind them! And then as a Magnificent MIL, you are supposed to make sure you do it right and mail them a gift or card so that it's there for their birthday.
A lot of the "advice" seems to me like it's written for someone who wants to be taken advantage of. There is some good advice but it's what I consider the common sense advice. Realize that your adult children will need to make their own holiday traditions and don't get upset when they don't revolve around you. I don't think reading this book is going to help you if you don't already know these things. It can give you a couple of ideas about other ways to do some things like holidays but if you think about it a little bit, I'm sure you can come up with some ideas on your own.
A lot of this seemed silly. If you just look at your DIL or SIL as a person that your child chose (which means they must have some redeeming qualities if you brought you child up right!) then surely you can respect them enough to treat them decently. As I learned from my parents: treat others as you would like to be treated. If they don't do the same in return, you bite your tongue because you love your child and grandchildren. Maybe I've just been lucky with the SILs that I have. I might change my mind when and if I ever get DILs. However, I was disappointed in this book and wouldn't recommend it to a friend.
As a Magnificent MIL you are not supposed to smoke when you go to the DIL or SIL's house but if they're smokers and they come to your house, you're supposed to make sure and plan important things around their smoking schedule and you should set up a place outside for them to smoke if you don't want them smoking in the house. I'm not and have never been a smoker but my objection is that MIL's are supposed to bend over backwards to accomodate DILs or SILs but we should expect nothing in return?
The same goes for the chapter on Reading Minds. When the married children forgot one of the Magnificent MIL's birthday repeatedly she mailed them a postcard two weeks in advance to tell them to buy a funny birthday card for their mom. Then one week in advance she mailed them a note telling them to mail the card. Why? If they forgot my birthday I wouldn't want to have to do that much work to remind them! And then as a Magnificent MIL, you are supposed to make sure you do it right and mail them a gift or card so that it's there for their birthday.
A lot of the "advice" seems to me like it's written for someone who wants to be taken advantage of. There is some good advice but it's what I consider the common sense advice. Realize that your adult children will need to make their own holiday traditions and don't get upset when they don't revolve around you. I don't think reading this book is going to help you if you don't already know these things. It can give you a couple of ideas about other ways to do some things like holidays but if you think about it a little bit, I'm sure you can come up with some ideas on your own.
A lot of this seemed silly. If you just look at your DIL or SIL as a person that your child chose (which means they must have some redeeming qualities if you brought you child up right!) then surely you can respect them enough to treat them decently. As I learned from my parents: treat others as you would like to be treated. If they don't do the same in return, you bite your tongue because you love your child and grandchildren. Maybe I've just been lucky with the SILs that I have. I might change my mind when and if I ever get DILs. However, I was disappointed in this book and wouldn't recommend it to a friend.
Not as funny as others thought
I perused the reviews before I downloaded this and was disappointed. It is not as funny as I was anticipating. I kept waiting for something to happen other than a few anecdotes and quips.
Your book proves my MIL was a saint. There are a few issues with marking territory and not calling ahead which my husband has a right to complain about, because I complain about those same issues. If you want to get along with the new member of the family, these rules will get you started on the right foot. After a few years, you will just be friends. I loved my MIL.
All MIL's and future MIL's should read this
This is wonderful advise for anyone with grown kids. This will help to foster a relationship with a DIL or SIL and not destroy it. I really wish my MIL would have read this years ago.
Should be required reading for Mother-in-Law(s)
This book should be required reading for all Mother-in-Law(s). Many young marriages could be saved. It is just plain common sense protocol to me, but I lived through 2 divorces and decided I would never let a Mother-in-Law have any influence over my marriage (if I chose to marry) again. This worked out very well for me. My third and last marriage has worked out beautiful. We lived far, far away from my husband's parents. Oh, and his Mother could not speak English. However, of all women in the whole world, I wish I could have gotten to know my late Mother-in-Law better. She was such a beautiful person and I wanted to learn her language just to speak with her. :(
A Must Read for ALL In-Laws/Parents
Wow, this book is fantastic and one that every single Mother-In-Law should read over and over again. I wonder if there is a subtle way to get a copy in my own MIL's hands!! My sister is getting married in the fall and I plan to get a copy as a gift for both MILs. I truly wish someone had done the same for me when I got married.
If you feel this book deserves anything less than 5 stars then more than likely you are probably guilty of breaking one or more "traditions" this book touches on. It's all about respect and boundaries for your adult children and the sooner parents/in-laws can see (and accept) that the better your relationship can and will be. If you're not following these sacred traditions then chances are you're probably already overstepping your boundaries and -whether the couple speaks up or not -ultimately hurting your relationship with your married child and their spouse.
If you feel this book deserves anything less than 5 stars then more than likely you are probably guilty of breaking one or more "traditions" this book touches on. It's all about respect and boundaries for your adult children and the sooner parents/in-laws can see (and accept) that the better your relationship can and will be. If you're not following these sacred traditions then chances are you're probably already overstepping your boundaries and -whether the couple speaks up or not -ultimately hurting your relationship with your married child and their spouse.
ust finished this book and glad I did. It touched on a lot of very touchy family problems in a fun and intertaining way. I learned a few good things in dealing with my own DIL. Thank you Haywood Smith.
Quick read. Can't beat the price! Good advice -- now if I can just follow it!
Great Advice for Everyone, MIL's encluded
This is a well written book full of good advice, insight and humor.
Being a MIL (Mother-in-law) I was so glad to get this on my Kindle. My son has been married for a year now I have fussed and fidgeted on how to approach this new position conferred on me. Part common sense, part keen insight, this book has given me courage to start some kind of dialogue with the new addition to my family.
My excuse for not starting sooner is 900 miles. That is the physical distance between us. :)
Being a MIL (Mother-in-law) I was so glad to get this on my Kindle. My son has been married for a year now I have fussed and fidgeted on how to approach this new position conferred on me. Part common sense, part keen insight, this book has given me courage to start some kind of dialogue with the new addition to my family.
My excuse for not starting sooner is 900 miles. That is the physical distance between us. :)
A funny collection of chapters spelling out the do's and don't's of being a good mother-in-law. It was a quick read and definitely made me laugh out loud.
This was a great week-end read. I found myself laughing out loud several times. I'm not a MIL yet, but there was still a lot of stuff I could relate to.
Poor writting ruined this work
The idea was wonderful and even some of the suggestions were spot on, but the writing was so atrocious that I wasn't even able to finish the book. The typos, errors and poor sentence construction was excruciating.
Also, for a very short book, the price was exorbitant. For around seven dollars I want something that will take more than 30mins to read.
Also, for a very short book, the price was exorbitant. For around seven dollars I want something that will take more than 30mins to read.
My son recently was engaged so this caught my eye - I thought it was not worth the time to read.
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This is a short (75 pages), easy read that will keep you laughing, yet is packed with wisdom. It would make an excellent gift for engagement parties or shower parties and according to the publisher, "It can even safely be given to a Mother-in-Law."