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Editorial Reviews
When Chelsea Handler needs to get a few things off her chest, she appeals to a higher power -- vodka. You would too if you found out that your boyfriend was having an affair with a Peekapoo or if you had to pretend to be honeymooning with your father in order to upgrade to first class. Welcome to Chelsea's world -- a place where absurdity reigns supreme and a quick wit is the best line of defense.
In this hilarious, deliciously skewed collection, Chelsea mines her past for stories about her family, relationships, and career that are at once singular and ridiculous. Whether she's convincing her third-grade class that she has been tapped to play Goldie Hawn's daughter in the sequel to Private Benjamin, deciding to be more egalitarian by dating a redhead, or looking out for a foulmouthed, rum-swilling little person who looks just like her...only smaller, Chelsea has a knack for getting herself into the most outrageous situations. Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea showcases the candor and irresistible turns of phrase that have made her one of the freshest voices in comedy today.
Related Reviews
One of the funniest people in America
I actually bought this book for my wife, since she had enjoyed Chelsea Handler's previous book, "My Horizontal Life." When the book arrived yesterday, I picked it up to peruse it and I couldn't put it down. This book is laugh-out-loud funny. The book contains stories from the author's life from around the age of 9 through adulthood that are funny from the perspective of men and women alike. As should be clear from the title, this book isn't for kids and the content can be pretty racy. If you aren't easily offended, however, it will probably be the most humorous book you read this year. I'd give it more than 5 stars if I could.
Note to Kindle owners - download the first chapter of the book. If the first chapter makes you laugh then you may enjoy the book. If you're not laughing at that point it doesn't get much better.
I've just finished reading the book and it was one of the hardest times I've ever had finishing a book. Although there are a few laughs here and there, the book wasn't hilarious to say the least. You might laugh once and then wait another chapter or three before the next one comes along. I bought the book because of all of the "rave - laugh out loud" reviews I saw from other readers.
I didn't have a problem with the language, the off-color humor or any of the "offensive" things that were said in the book - it was just boring and not funny. What made it even worse is when some of the gags were used multiple times. For example in one story someone looks like they have Buckwheat in a leg-lock, a few chapters later someone looks like they have a clown in a leg-lock. Again, I was compelled to review this book because I couldn't believe so many people rated it 5-stars. I like her on TV, but the book was a snoozer.
I've just finished reading the book and it was one of the hardest times I've ever had finishing a book. Although there are a few laughs here and there, the book wasn't hilarious to say the least. You might laugh once and then wait another chapter or three before the next one comes along. I bought the book because of all of the "rave - laugh out loud" reviews I saw from other readers.
I didn't have a problem with the language, the off-color humor or any of the "offensive" things that were said in the book - it was just boring and not funny. What made it even worse is when some of the gags were used multiple times. For example in one story someone looks like they have Buckwheat in a leg-lock, a few chapters later someone looks like they have a clown in a leg-lock. Again, I was compelled to review this book because I couldn't believe so many people rated it 5-stars. I like her on TV, but the book was a snoozer.
Having seen Chelsea doing stand up and on Girls Behaving Badly, I was anxious to see how her wicked sarcastic wit would translate into text. It's fantastic! A seriously gifted writer, who combines funny and uninhibited raunchiness better than any woman. And it's not just the sheer ridiculous circumstances she encounters. She reflects about her mindless journeys and the meaning of life in such an amusing, self-deprecating and cynical manner.
Filled with funny anecdotes, she has that trashy comedienne's gift of saying everything we think about but are afraid to say. And she manages to share absolutely horrifying events and somehow make them hysterical!
There are some hilarious and uncomfortable family situations. Her father was quite the provider of wisdom, selling used junkyard cars out of their front yard, while making inappropriate sexual innuendos towards his daughters.
There's some really funny and humiliating youth debacles and misadventures. My favorites; her embarrassing and preposterous fake celebrity elementary school tale, a LOL birthday party for a friendless girl full of re-gifting, pretending to be honeymooning with her father in order to upgrade to first class. The Mini-Me and Prison Break chapters are just classics. Frankly if she wasn't successful, she may have ended up a basket case.
At some points in a story, I laughed so hard, my husband kept trying to steal the book from me. I didn't want the book to end. Everyone can find something to relate to in one of these stories.
If you are sensitive or quick to take offense, I would pass on this one. If you have a repressed wild side, you'll dive in headfirst and relish her antics and live vicariously through them. Also, if you like reading funny out of control drinking and sex stories, I'm half-way through Chelsea's other book My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One-Night Stands and it's great.
And although I can't admit it to my husband, I secretly loved the book that is the male version of the same theme. Steamy sex, hilarious, and very Bondish, as in 007.
High Heels and Dirty Deals - Globetrotting Tales of Debauchery from a Binge-drinking Nymphomaniac
Filled with funny anecdotes, she has that trashy comedienne's gift of saying everything we think about but are afraid to say. And she manages to share absolutely horrifying events and somehow make them hysterical!
There are some hilarious and uncomfortable family situations. Her father was quite the provider of wisdom, selling used junkyard cars out of their front yard, while making inappropriate sexual innuendos towards his daughters.
There's some really funny and humiliating youth debacles and misadventures. My favorites; her embarrassing and preposterous fake celebrity elementary school tale, a LOL birthday party for a friendless girl full of re-gifting, pretending to be honeymooning with her father in order to upgrade to first class. The Mini-Me and Prison Break chapters are just classics. Frankly if she wasn't successful, she may have ended up a basket case.
At some points in a story, I laughed so hard, my husband kept trying to steal the book from me. I didn't want the book to end. Everyone can find something to relate to in one of these stories.
If you are sensitive or quick to take offense, I would pass on this one. If you have a repressed wild side, you'll dive in headfirst and relish her antics and live vicariously through them. Also, if you like reading funny out of control drinking and sex stories, I'm half-way through Chelsea's other book My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One-Night Stands and it's great.
And although I can't admit it to my husband, I secretly loved the book that is the male version of the same theme. Steamy sex, hilarious, and very Bondish, as in 007.
High Heels and Dirty Deals - Globetrotting Tales of Debauchery from a Binge-drinking Nymphomaniac
This is a laugh-out-loud book, great for the beach, not so good for a plane where your laughing will wake babies and make the other passengers jealous they don't have a copy. I got mine for my Kindle and I read it in one sitting. Seriously, pretty freaking funny.
So hilarious! Couldn't put it down.
All I can say is buy this book!!! I was reading it on my flight home yesterday and was laughing SO hard that people were staring at me...but I couldn't help it. Chelsea is just that funny! Her writing about her parents is the best. And as a redheaded woman, I agree with her about reheaded men from my own experience. I try to avoid them too. Plus, she's way funnier than that crazy Manc, Karl Pilkington.
When is the next one coming out, Chelsea?
When is the next one coming out, Chelsea?
Let me first be clear that I love Chelsea Handler. I DVR her show every night, I've even been to a taping in her studio and I even have tickets to her upcoming standup appearance.
Her first book was hilarious, but this one just misses the mark. Yes, there were a handful of times that I burst out laughing - she is a brilliant comedian. But the book is extremely disjointed and it was a struggle to see it through to the end. Was she just trying to fill up space? And why is Chuey all over the cover (my guess - to sell books) he's not mentioned once in the book (except for in the Acknowledgements).
I really can't figure out if she tried too hard, or didn't try hard enough.
Blah...I recommend saving your money. Sorry Chels...
Her first book was hilarious, but this one just misses the mark. Yes, there were a handful of times that I burst out laughing - she is a brilliant comedian. But the book is extremely disjointed and it was a struggle to see it through to the end. Was she just trying to fill up space? And why is Chuey all over the cover (my guess - to sell books) he's not mentioned once in the book (except for in the Acknowledgements).
I really can't figure out if she tried too hard, or didn't try hard enough.
Blah...I recommend saving your money. Sorry Chels...
If you are going to joke about spending time in jail for drunk driving or being aroused by a dog, you'd better make it wicked funny. This just wasn't. Were prior 5-star reviewers just rabid fans or were they as drunk as she got the publisher who agreed to print this?
This is the worst book I have read in at least two years -- and I read lots of books. Get this one free from the library. At least then you will have wasted only your time.
This is the worst book I have read in at least two years -- and I read lots of books. Get this one free from the library. At least then you will have wasted only your time.
This one was a misfire... sorry Chelsea fans.
This book was recommended to me by a friend who adores Chelsea. My friend and I have a similar (sick) sense of humor - but I disagreed with her on this book. The comedy felt forced, contrived and predictable - she was trying too hard. I forced myself to keep reading with hopes that it would get better - I only made it through half the book - I had to give up. This one was a misfire... sorry Chelsea fans. Personally, I just don't find her funny. In concept, Chelsea has all the right components for "funny", but again, she seems plastic to me - not genuinely funny.
Are you there, toilet mouth? It's me, Schuyler.
I can hardly be considered a prude. At 72 years old, and after a lifetime of oilfields and firefighting, I've heard and uttered my share of potty talk. But something about Chelsea Handler's extremely personal collection of memoirs, ARE YOU THERE, VODKA? IT'S ME, CHELSEA didn't sit well with me. I know. If you're going to be offended, don't read it.
But read it I did because I love funny stuff, especially humorous writing. Ms. Handler is very funny and some of her prose had me hiccupping from laughing so hard. I got uncomfortable, however, with some of the more graphic language, descriptions of sweaty sex, and references to anatomy that came from a public restroom wall instead of a medical book. I thought that a more subtle way of handling these subjects, perhaps through cleverly veiled and risqué double entendres, would be more easily endured than through whacks with a meat axe.
I think back to one of my favorite humorists, Dave Barry. He can paint the same word picture as Handler without using the coarse language so prevalent in this book. His ability to dodge around the use of obscenities makes his work even funnier when the reader associates what he wrote with what he meant.
I appreciate the fact that Handler makes her living through the shock factor. I'm sure her fans are used to the candor of her presentations. That's why I don't trash the book with a poor rating. My faint heartedness does not make the book a bad one - it only makes it hard for me to read. It doesn't mean that I don't recognize a talented individual and Handler is that in spades.
I watch Handler's show from time to time, and I find her to be funny and entertaining, which is why I bought this book. I unfortunately I found it to be neither.
She's all over the place, skipping around, throwing out random scenarios, with nothing to tie them together. And then the book ends just as randomly.
It seemed like she was trying to hard too be funny. The situations should be funny, but the writing is just so poor, and the stories are just plain wierd. They have the feel of not-quite-fiction but not-quite-fact. It's not that I was offended by her humor, or crassness, I just don't think she pulled it off the jokes in this book. Its poorly delivered.
Please keep in mind, I was not looking for fine literature or well-developed prose. I just wanted some cheap laughs. I might have laughed twice.
I am honeslty surprised someone published this book.
Save your money, don't buy it.
She's all over the place, skipping around, throwing out random scenarios, with nothing to tie them together. And then the book ends just as randomly.
It seemed like she was trying to hard too be funny. The situations should be funny, but the writing is just so poor, and the stories are just plain wierd. They have the feel of not-quite-fiction but not-quite-fact. It's not that I was offended by her humor, or crassness, I just don't think she pulled it off the jokes in this book. Its poorly delivered.
Please keep in mind, I was not looking for fine literature or well-developed prose. I just wanted some cheap laughs. I might have laughed twice.
I am honeslty surprised someone published this book.
Save your money, don't buy it.
The first story in this memoir begins when CH is seven and the last one is when she's in her thirties. There's her adventures in babysitting; her I-don't-want-to-go-to-someone's-party story; the midget story; and one where she takes her dad on vacay. I read this thinking she would have the "Seinfeld" gift of taking the mundane and making it funny (Jerry turned waiting for table at a Chinese restaurant and losing your car in a garage into comedy gold). She doesn't. CH took the mundane and kept it that there. Maybe these stories are funny when you're drunk and she's slurring them to you. Also, her L.A Sex and the City life seems kind of sad and seedy. Some of these stories make her come off as plain mean. She's funnier on TV.
I picked this book up at Barnes and Noble, sat down and began to read. Started to laugh so hard that I bought the book and finished it at home, where I could laugh in private.
Chelsea Handler delivers this book with the dead-on hilarious precision of the stand-up comic that she is. Handler's strong voice shines throughout the book and it is almost impossible to put down.
The book is divided into chapters according to age. In "Blacklisted," you meet 9 year old Chelsea who is humiliated on a daily basis at school for her father's car. She invents a hilarious story that soon spirals out of control and the story is a delight.
In "Chelsea in Charge," Handler writes about her 12 year entrepreneurial spirit as a babysitter on Martha's Vineyard. What unfolds is unforgettable.
From "Re-Gift": "I promptly responded to the Evite, wrote something about having diarrhea later that night, and headed back to bed to rub one out with my vibrator."
From "Jumped": "I consider myself to be a very obnoxious person, but even I would never tell a guy that he has a small penis."
Handler is hilarious and Are Your There, Vodka, It's Me, Chelsea is a must-read for anyone who needs a good laugh.
By the author of the award winning book, Harmonious Environment: Beautify, Detoxify and Energize Your Life, Your Home and Your Planet.
Chelsea Handler delivers this book with the dead-on hilarious precision of the stand-up comic that she is. Handler's strong voice shines throughout the book and it is almost impossible to put down.
The book is divided into chapters according to age. In "Blacklisted," you meet 9 year old Chelsea who is humiliated on a daily basis at school for her father's car. She invents a hilarious story that soon spirals out of control and the story is a delight.
In "Chelsea in Charge," Handler writes about her 12 year entrepreneurial spirit as a babysitter on Martha's Vineyard. What unfolds is unforgettable.
From "Re-Gift": "I promptly responded to the Evite, wrote something about having diarrhea later that night, and headed back to bed to rub one out with my vibrator."
From "Jumped": "I consider myself to be a very obnoxious person, but even I would never tell a guy that he has a small penis."
Handler is hilarious and Are Your There, Vodka, It's Me, Chelsea is a must-read for anyone who needs a good laugh.
By the author of the award winning book, Harmonious Environment: Beautify, Detoxify and Energize Your Life, Your Home and Your Planet.
Chelsea, Don't quit your night job.
When shopping for a few good "reads", I thought I'd try a genre different from my usual mysteries, thrillers or historic novels. Here we go...some Humor! After anxiously awaiting Chelsea's books, I dove right in after they arrived. Fellow readers: Save your money. The author's stand up routines on YouTube would have given you 90% of what was written. Some humor is not meant to be copied from "Stand-Up" to paper. It was bound nicely and had clear print. This will be in my 25 cent box at the next garage sale.
Chelsea's funny.....the book not so much.
I enjoy her TV show, but this book just wasn't that funny. Amusing but not really funny. I got bored with the material about halfway through it.
I love Chelsea and even went to her book signing, waited two hours and paid the full price for it. This book is unreadable. It is stupid, badly written, obviously very embellished, and kinda gross. I read Sedaris, Buroughs, and Lancaster. I mean this is my favorite genre, but she did not pull it off. You can tell she is trying so hard to be funny and get one liners in, that you get no connection to her. Bummer!
Not a big fan of this book. Chelsea's humor is pretty juvenile...dirty but still juvenile. I did laugh out loud once or twice but the rest of the book was pretty boring.
Amazon recommended this book when I purchased No Hope for Gomez!. While not as sharp and outright funny as No Hope, I did end up enjoying this book. It takes longer to get started, but it's filled with amusing anecdotes and little stories. If you don't like one, chances are you'll like some of the others.
After reading "My Horizontal Life" I was really anticipating this book. It was a bit of a letdown. It's not bad by any means, but it certainly isn't nearly as entertaining. I would say this is definitely a "save your money and check it out at the library" type of book. I loaned it to a friend and she's had a hard time slogging through it too.
I am very much familiar with Handler's humor and I watch her late night shows fairly regularly. Some of her jokes are borderline tasteless but I find them funny, nonetheless.
Unfortunately, IMO, her humor doesn't translate well in a book. The best way I can describe this book is that it's like watching one of those Wayans Brother's movies; it's marketed as a comedy but you ended up laughing the first few scenes and disgusted with the rest or leaving at the middle of the screening.
The book is just one far-fetched story after another and while funny on few parts...the rest are just...well...stupid....not even remotely funny.
I urge everyone to avoid this garbage. Seeing this novel garner so much positive reviews made me lose a lot of confidence on Amazon's rating system.
Unfortunately, IMO, her humor doesn't translate well in a book. The best way I can describe this book is that it's like watching one of those Wayans Brother's movies; it's marketed as a comedy but you ended up laughing the first few scenes and disgusted with the rest or leaving at the middle of the screening.
The book is just one far-fetched story after another and while funny on few parts...the rest are just...well...stupid....not even remotely funny.
I urge everyone to avoid this garbage. Seeing this novel garner so much positive reviews made me lose a lot of confidence on Amazon's rating system.
I loved this book and couldn't put it down. I was literally laughing out loud! She writes about a lot of funny things that everyone thinks about but don't really talk about. I love how open and sarcastic she is. She has a great sense of humor! It seems like women would enjoy this more so than men. Also, this is not appropiate for teenagers and younger. Much of the subject matter is for mature readers.
A Voyeuristic Read That is Shockingly Offensive At Times
Having watched, and enjoyed, Chelsea Handler's TV show I wasn't expecting much of this book other than sheer entertainment. As a compilation of random short stories from her life you will get your money's worth in humor and entertainment along with a newfound sense of the bizzare. You will also get a fair share of foul and down right crude language that can be quite offensive at times (at many times). What kept me reading was, well, I can only liken it to driving past a car accident. You know you shouldn't look but you can't help yourself then after you pass it you feel a bit ashamed for sneaking a peek. Right now I feel ashamed.
Without the benefit of TV censors Ms. Handler can be shockingly offensive. Not only is the language distasteful but the stories themselves are filled with people doing ridiculous things, including Ms. Handler, and acting as if it's all completely normal. I found myself vacillating between disbelief and being utterly stunned that people would act in such ways.
The book is a very easy read and a true escape from reality. It is written at about a fifth grade level, yet periodically the following words (and others) appear; unctuously, effusive and mercurial. The work of an editor? Overall, a book with humor and amazingly offensive language.
Without the benefit of TV censors Ms. Handler can be shockingly offensive. Not only is the language distasteful but the stories themselves are filled with people doing ridiculous things, including Ms. Handler, and acting as if it's all completely normal. I found myself vacillating between disbelief and being utterly stunned that people would act in such ways.
The book is a very easy read and a true escape from reality. It is written at about a fifth grade level, yet periodically the following words (and others) appear; unctuously, effusive and mercurial. The work of an editor? Overall, a book with humor and amazingly offensive language.
Not sure if it's as good as her prior book, which I'd still like to read. But found this to be very disjointed, and more sad than funny. I like to drink as much (if not more) than the next person, but not to the point of repeatedly peeing myself, as she does. That's just sort of pathetic.
This material is pure puff; nothing gets treated as serious or meaningful in all of her observations. She is funny at times, but when I finished this book (in a couple of hours) I almost felt like I had just gotten caught reading Cosmo on line at the check out stand. She has all the depth of a sophomore sorority girl.
Maybe it's just me, but while I found parts of this book amusing, overall, I found it profoundly depressing. That a smart, funny, beautiful and multi talented young woman chooses to spend her life in bad jobs, one night stands, and the bottom of various bottles of alcohol does not make me laugh, it makes me sad. I did, however, very much enjoy the parts where she writes about her family. Good writer, bad material.
I listened to the audio version and it was a total waste of time. I casually watch her on TV and thought she was funny. This comes across as bitter, cynical and not very comical.
Why are people not giving her the treatment Michael whatshisname from Seinfeld got? She says a lot of very racist lines; a lot of the lines are supposdely from her dad, but still. Hearing her say Oriental and black as night describing people is not funny in any way. Hearing her talk about orphans from other countries that she "adopts" and names Earl is not funny. Hearing her talk about a child's cleft palate referred to as "hare lip" is not funny. Hearing her yuch it up about her many abortions is not funny. This book is very funny in parts. Her babysitting gig was very amusing. A twelve year old sitting a 14 year old with anger tendencies was hysterical. The dui scene was very clever. But overall, cringing at her being mean to people took away from what could be funny & clever book.
Well ... she got the lying part right.
Chelsea is touted as one of the top comedy writers in the industry. This book is touted as "hilarious."
HOW can that BE?
At best, I may have smiled a time or two in the first few chapters (and honestly, that's as far as I got). What bothered me the most? She'd reference certain periods of time and consistently got facts wrong.
The book opens in 1984 with her lying to a boy about being a movie actress, in which she claims to have read everything about the making of the Breakfast Club. Odd, since that movie wasn't released until 1985. She finds herself in prison at the age of 21 (1996), wondering if they have Internet there. Odd, since, in 1996 most people had only a slight grasp of the internet (via AOL) and since it wasn't the easiest thing to navigate back then, the only ones addicted to it were geeks. During the strip search, she claims no one laughed at her "junk in the trunk" reference. Well that's most likely because no one USED that phrase back then. She goes on to say that after her release from prison, she'd (sarcastically) planned on researching the name of the woman for whom the jail was named, by googling it. Um. Come ON. There WAS no Google in 1996.
So is the entire book just a poorly written, poorly researched lie? How did this end up on ANY bestseller list? I couldn't take any more and stopped reading. I'll donate it. Maybe someone somewhere needs a good door stop.
HOW can that BE?
At best, I may have smiled a time or two in the first few chapters (and honestly, that's as far as I got). What bothered me the most? She'd reference certain periods of time and consistently got facts wrong.
The book opens in 1984 with her lying to a boy about being a movie actress, in which she claims to have read everything about the making of the Breakfast Club. Odd, since that movie wasn't released until 1985. She finds herself in prison at the age of 21 (1996), wondering if they have Internet there. Odd, since, in 1996 most people had only a slight grasp of the internet (via AOL) and since it wasn't the easiest thing to navigate back then, the only ones addicted to it were geeks. During the strip search, she claims no one laughed at her "junk in the trunk" reference. Well that's most likely because no one USED that phrase back then. She goes on to say that after her release from prison, she'd (sarcastically) planned on researching the name of the woman for whom the jail was named, by googling it. Um. Come ON. There WAS no Google in 1996.
So is the entire book just a poorly written, poorly researched lie? How did this end up on ANY bestseller list? I couldn't take any more and stopped reading. I'll donate it. Maybe someone somewhere needs a good door stop.
I wish I could find a woman like her! You must get this book! and watch her show! I agree with the other reviwer on two things she can hang with the guys and Mr Instability is hilarious.
Chelsea the author vs. Chelsea the TV show host.
I LOVE Chelsea's show. I don't love Chelsea's book.
I have read a lot of the reviews of this book on here, and am mildly amused at the stuff people are choosing to praise/trash it over.
People are suggesting that her writing is 'sophomoric' and 'juvenile'. I'm sorry, it's just not. She is a fine writer. And if you knew anything about Chelsea, you would obviously assume this book is going to be offensive, crass, and full of sexual/alcohol references. Big deal.
I was looking forward to that type of stuff going into this book. I think she is hysterical on her TV show, and was hoping she could really nail her humor with a book of short stories.
However, this book was very hard to get through for one reason. My biggest problem with it, is that she is quite frankly full of crap. These stories are not even slightly believable, and are so ridiculously embellished that I couldn't help but cringe at times.
Of course, if they were written as *fiction*, some of the scenarios would be deemed as classic moments of comedic brilliance. The problem is-- she is trying to suggest that these are auto-biographical stories. And... they just... aren't. Her liberal use of embellishment in an attempt to make these stories more interesting really works against her with "Vodka..."
If you are itching to know if you should spend your money on this, I have some advice first: Go to a local bookstore and spend 15 minutes reading the first 2 stories. If, at the end of the first 2 stories, you aren't cringing over the far-fetched nature of the book-- buy it.
I have read a lot of the reviews of this book on here, and am mildly amused at the stuff people are choosing to praise/trash it over.
People are suggesting that her writing is 'sophomoric' and 'juvenile'. I'm sorry, it's just not. She is a fine writer. And if you knew anything about Chelsea, you would obviously assume this book is going to be offensive, crass, and full of sexual/alcohol references. Big deal.
I was looking forward to that type of stuff going into this book. I think she is hysterical on her TV show, and was hoping she could really nail her humor with a book of short stories.
However, this book was very hard to get through for one reason. My biggest problem with it, is that she is quite frankly full of crap. These stories are not even slightly believable, and are so ridiculously embellished that I couldn't help but cringe at times.
Of course, if they were written as *fiction*, some of the scenarios would be deemed as classic moments of comedic brilliance. The problem is-- she is trying to suggest that these are auto-biographical stories. And... they just... aren't. Her liberal use of embellishment in an attempt to make these stories more interesting really works against her with "Vodka..."
If you are itching to know if you should spend your money on this, I have some advice first: Go to a local bookstore and spend 15 minutes reading the first 2 stories. If, at the end of the first 2 stories, you aren't cringing over the far-fetched nature of the book-- buy it.
I bought this book because it was recommended in a magazine. I was very disappointed! I read the first chapter and, quite frankly, didn't find it very amusing. So then I skipped around a bit hoping some of the other chapters were better. Not so. Perhaps it's not my brand of humor but, despite what some critics have said, she is definitely not the NEW Erma Bombeck!
Bottom line: I found her book mostly crass, crude humor and some parts were downright disgusting.
Definitely don't recommend!
Bottom line: I found her book mostly crass, crude humor and some parts were downright disgusting.
Definitely don't recommend!
Don't watch this author on her "TV show", but didn't enjoy her book. I read for a different type of entertainment/education purpose and Chelsea's vulgarity is just not funny to me.
A must-read if you like Chelsea's humor. She holds nothing back, and it is a riot--
the best in her series!
the best in her series!
This is one of the worst books I have read. The first chapter had some really funny parts, but as you get into the book it goes downhill really fast. I struggled to finish it and would not buy any more of her books. Reading it was like getting bamboo shoots under your fingernails.
not as funny as her other book
This book was humorous, but not funny. I guess if I had read this one first, then Horizontal Life, I would have been more impressed. But still a good way to waste time.
Some funny parts, and a good light read
A light read, and in some parts pretty funny, Chelsea Handler tells stories from her life in a literary version of a stand up comedy show. I felt that in parts the text began to drag, and that it wasn't really saying anything all that interesting. But some parts were pretty funny. I particularly enjoyed the story where she has to spend a night in prison. I thought that one very well done. The writing style is very conversational, making it easy to read. I would recommend this book to bring to the bring to the beach or for whenever you feel like a quick read that doesn't need to much brain power.
Don't Listen to This Book While Driving
My husband and I listened to the CD while he was driving our RV. He's a great driver, but still, it's hard to overcome convulsions and tearing when at the helm of a 40,000 lb bus. We listened to the rest over several parked evenings - for our own safety. If you insist on listening to the CD, rather than reader the book, I highly recommend not doing so in a moving vehicle!
Book/Are you there, Vodka?, it's me, Chelsea
This book is very comical...I enjoyed it very much...especially during these stressful times...It was a joy to read and not too long...I do not read anything but Biographies and serious non-fiction books. I would recommend this book as "medicine" to pick you up.
I feel like I've come late to the party that is Chelsea Handler, but better late than never. This collection of stories is in a word, hilarious. Chelsea is a natural storyteller and these pages go by so quickly I found myself looking for more when I reached page 264. She's original, irreverent, bawdy, gutsy and VERY funny.
It's hard to pick a favorite, but the story of boyfriend Mohammad and the Peekapoo (apparently a gay dog), and another that included a night with the drunken "midget" named Kimmy, had me laughing out loud and sharing snippets. There are no stinkers in the collection, each is funnier than the previous as you get to know her humor and her quirks, which yes--DO include a lot of vodka.
If you like the work of Laurie Notaro The Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club: True Tales from a Magnificent and Clumsy Life or Sandra Tsing Loh A Year in Van Nuys you'll love the work of Chelsea Handler.
Michele Cozzens is the author of It's Not Your Mother's Bridge Club
It's hard to pick a favorite, but the story of boyfriend Mohammad and the Peekapoo (apparently a gay dog), and another that included a night with the drunken "midget" named Kimmy, had me laughing out loud and sharing snippets. There are no stinkers in the collection, each is funnier than the previous as you get to know her humor and her quirks, which yes--DO include a lot of vodka.
If you like the work of Laurie Notaro The Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club: True Tales from a Magnificent and Clumsy Life or Sandra Tsing Loh A Year in Van Nuys you'll love the work of Chelsea Handler.
Michele Cozzens is the author of It's Not Your Mother's Bridge Club
not bad, not great. good for a bathroom read. couple good funny parts, some very drawn out chapters.
amusing but not as funny as I had hoped
This is well worth a read if you are fan of her show. Read it on the beach or the plane. However it is not laugh out loud funny (for me) and not particularly well written. If you can wait for the paperback, I would.
One of the best books I've ever read!
After reading Chelsea's first book "My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One-Night Stands" I could not wait to read this one. I truly loved her first book, but she really outdone herself with this one. I laughed out loud at least twenty times while reading it. I would highly recommend it to anyone wanting a good laugh. Chelsea Handler is not only a great comedian, but a wonderful author! I hope she writes another book soon. I will be first in line to buy it!!!
I liked this book somewhat but kept turning it over to see if it was listed as fiction or non-fiction. I could not get past the feeling that what i was reading was true or not. i think she tends to take an incident and embellish it dramatically and this proved problematic for me. I think she is funny enough that she can write about her life and still make you laugh without questioning the veracity of the incidents she described. Yes, i did laugh out loud a couple of times but still i had that HMMMMMMMMMMM.....did this really happen feeling throughout the book. If you can get past that, you will enjoy the book. If you are like me, then you might have a problem with it.
I wanted a book on audio CD so I bought this book. I have watched Handler's show on E and thought the banter and gossip can be pretty funny and/or interesting at times, so I thought this might give me a good laugh or at least a smile.
I listened to the first CD and by the time it was over I was totally irritated. Mad at myself for wasting my money mostly. You know the feeling when something is so bad or disappointing you want to run screaming from the room? I cannot put into words how profoundly disappointed I am in this book. In my personal opinion, this is not funny. It is annoying and stupid.
I thought I might listen to the second CD just to give it another chance, but after reading some negative reviews here (by readers who had read the WHOLE book) I decided not to waste any more of my time and return this to Amazon for a refund.
I'm still searching for a good book on audio CD.
I listened to the first CD and by the time it was over I was totally irritated. Mad at myself for wasting my money mostly. You know the feeling when something is so bad or disappointing you want to run screaming from the room? I cannot put into words how profoundly disappointed I am in this book. In my personal opinion, this is not funny. It is annoying and stupid.
I thought I might listen to the second CD just to give it another chance, but after reading some negative reviews here (by readers who had read the WHOLE book) I decided not to waste any more of my time and return this to Amazon for a refund.
I'm still searching for a good book on audio CD.
Chelsea is the funniest compulsive-lying misanthrope with the emotional maturity of an eight-year-old boy (her words, not mine!) you've ever met. She effortlessly manages to tread the line between outrageous, edgy humor and offensiveness with grace and panache. Written in a confessional Dear Diary style, her stories are easy to read and fun to indulge in. This book is a must-read for any fan of Chelsea Lately.
It's a funny, sarcastic and relaxing read. She has some interesting stories, whether true or not, and she definitely knows how to tell them. Perfect for when you're tanning by the pool.
Are you There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea
Laugh out Loud Funny! I have read all her books. Her writing and stories will entertain you. Can't wait for next book.
Maybe it was the fact I love Chelsea's column in Cosmo, "Chelsea Lets Loose". Maybe it was the fact my friends loved this book. Maybe it was the fact that I liked the title. For whatever reason, I really wanted to love this book.
Unfortunately, I was incredibly disappointed. I love books of all genre but could not for the life of me manage to finish this one. I found it simply dull, boring, and not funny. Honestly, this is not worth your time reading.
Unfortunately, I was incredibly disappointed. I love books of all genre but could not for the life of me manage to finish this one. I found it simply dull, boring, and not funny. Honestly, this is not worth your time reading.
Chelsea Handler reminds me of a female version of Bob Saget. And no, I'm not talking about the dad on Full House that hung out with hot Uncle Jessie (even with the mullet) version here. So if very crude and in your face hold nothing back humor is something that doesn't appeal to you - do not pick this book up. If it does, well then sit back and have a good laugh.
After reading her first book, My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One Night Stands, I was pretty excited to get my hands on this one. The book itself doesn't have a storyline at all. Each chapter is kind of like a short stand up, and most of them were pretty hilarious. I was kind of disappointed that some of the chapters were a little more dull compared to her first book. And by the title I expected a little more crazy drunken stories. By the middle of the book though, the tears were rolling, and I was laughing out loud. There are some pretty crazy scenarios in here, and every chapter that involved any of her friends had me completely rolling. The quick witted humor is another thing, half of the dialogue is something that catches you so off guard all you can do is laugh. All in all the book was a pretty good read and if she were to write another one, I'd still be pumped to read it.
Although I didn't find the book as hilarious as the first, I think there should be some sort of warning label about busting out in hysteria laughter. So for my public service announcement, do not read either one of these books out in public. Especially if you are sitting in a waiting room at the dentist office like I was when I read the first book. Believe me, you get some strange looks.
After reading her first book, My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One Night Stands, I was pretty excited to get my hands on this one. The book itself doesn't have a storyline at all. Each chapter is kind of like a short stand up, and most of them were pretty hilarious. I was kind of disappointed that some of the chapters were a little more dull compared to her first book. And by the title I expected a little more crazy drunken stories. By the middle of the book though, the tears were rolling, and I was laughing out loud. There are some pretty crazy scenarios in here, and every chapter that involved any of her friends had me completely rolling. The quick witted humor is another thing, half of the dialogue is something that catches you so off guard all you can do is laugh. All in all the book was a pretty good read and if she were to write another one, I'd still be pumped to read it.
Although I didn't find the book as hilarious as the first, I think there should be some sort of warning label about busting out in hysteria laughter. So for my public service announcement, do not read either one of these books out in public. Especially if you are sitting in a waiting room at the dentist office like I was when I read the first book. Believe me, you get some strange looks.
I was very disappointed after reading this book and wanted my money back. I wish I could locate my receipt :-( I read her first book and laughed out loud so was pretty excited to read this one. Its really a waste of time and money. She's not funny but is trying very hard to be in this book which makes it a drag to read. The stories are lame and most of them seem to be made up to the point where you dont even want to pretend they could potentially be true. Over all, I was struggling to finish the book since it put me to sleep every time. Get it from the library if you must read it, dont waste your money.
Okay but not as funny as her usual stuff
"Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea" is basically a collection of anecdotes about interesting and crazy memories Chelsea Handler has from her past. The stories stretched from her childhood to adulthood, including memories like the time she convinced her 3rd grade class she was going to be in a movie with Goldie Hawn, and her first DUI, through to a vacation to Costa Rica with her father and an interesting pair of friends.
It's by no means an amazing book, but good for a few laughs and a quick read. If you're a fan of Chelsea Handler, it's fairly enjoyable. I don't think it's up to par with her usual humor though.
It's by no means an amazing book, but good for a few laughs and a quick read. If you're a fan of Chelsea Handler, it's fairly enjoyable. I don't think it's up to par with her usual humor though.
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